There was this TV preacher dude on one of the religious channels the other night, doing a show about "The DaVinci Code" movie, and how it was some big deception in the church.

I don't remember exactly what the book or all the fuss is supposedly about. To me, it seems unecessary and redundant to be suprised that the world is waxing diabolical against the Lord. My reaction upon finding out such things usually runs along the lines of "Golly. Really?"

So one evil thing leads to another, and this guy eventually builds up to a call to arms for Christians to unite, uprise, and "take back" something (this generation's favourite christian revolutionary buzzword).

"Yes, friends, the Lord Jesus is under attack."

This kind of thing always amuses me. I find it almost hillariously funny to think that some people are actually worried that Jesus is under attack. Why?

Because it's about the most preposterous thing I can even begin to imagine. It's about the same as if someone came and told me they had a super-soaker and they were about to mount an assault on the sun. A "snowball's chance in hell" is to me quite an apt description.

And even if it's true (and it is), what help of mine does Jesus need? If he's got a nuclear bomb to take out a gnat, can I really add anything useful here? Does He need help carrying it? When the nuclear fireball erupts, can my rolled up newspaper add something meaningful to the bottom line?

This is something I alighted on briefly in my review of "The Passion." I find it odd that people think there is some kind of spiritual warfare going on between Satan and Jesus. There's not!

The notion that anything in all of God's creation could rise up and actually pose a threat to him is so ludicrous that I'm pretty sure that even entertaining the notion, for even a moment, is probably the unforgivable "sin unto death" that Paul mentioned. (Note: I think I'm joking, but just as I finished typing it, I also think there might be something of a truth about it. At the root of the unforgivable sin, there's gotta be something about a willingness to believe an absolute absurdity about God.)

Jesus is under attack?

Yawn. OK, wake me when it's over, will ya?