I know that almost no one can really empathize with other people over the death of their pets. A pet is special only to it's family.

And yet, here I am, mourning the loss of our oldest dog, Bernard.

He made it to 13 years old before sucumbing to the ravages of age. Like my wife said, "Way to go, Adam and Eve. Is this what you had in mind?"

SIN=DEATH, and not just for man.



It's sad enough that man has to suffer the wages of sin.

But for all creation?


In the end, I had romantic notions of holding him in a towel in my arms to comfort him as he passed away. But death is horrible.

As his heavy breathing progressed to convulsions, and eventually to retching and evacuation, I had no option but to take him out of the house. There are children here.

And so, on a bright and yet utterly cold afternoon on January 20th, 2009, while Barack Obama was being paraded around Washinton D.C. in a limosine, I was debating whether or not I let him take hours to die on the cold ground, alone instead of in my arms by the fireplace, or put him out of his (our?) misery.

In the end, it came down to a heart wrenching decision: do I use the .22 and hope for a "clean" end, but risk the need for a second, or even third shot? Or do I go for the .357 Magnum, and go for a certain, quick, and painless (but messy) end?

People who have read my paintball article, and the photo essay should understand why each and every picture there ends with the same caption:

"All this and more is the penalty of sin in the world. Every sin, no matter how trivial, ultimately results in what you see here. Destroyed lives, misery, ruin, death and destruction."

And it's not just the man that sins who pays the price.

The pain I've endured today is over an animal. How much more must God grieve over the loss of each and every man, woman and child?

God forgive us. But more than that; God grant us "repentance that leads to life."

Goodbye, Bernie. I remember the hour long drive home from Talequah with you tucked away warm inside my jacket. I wish you could have lived with us forever. But, thanks, Adam.

And yet, I know, that I'm no better. Bernard died because of sin in the world. And I've contributed more than enough of my own.